It's Who You Know

“You gotta network. You don’t network enough. It’s who you know, you know?”

It is my least favorite business model ever. I know enough people in LA. I like working hard more than knowing many. You line up 10 people in this town and there is a good chance I will not enjoy 9 of them.

Take the “Yoga Mentor” I met the other day. Didn’t even know those existed! I hope she doesn’t have industry connections, because you know it’s who you know, and then I’d have to be friends with a Yoga Mentor and when I talk about her people will think I have an imaginary friend.

Another guy revealed he is “in recovery.” But not for drugs and alcohol; he is in Underachievers Anonymous. First of all, if you have trouble being productive, taking time out of every day to meet up with other unproductive people doesn’t exactly sound like a solution. But who am I to judge? I am mostly curious about how this program works. What is a Underachievers Anonymous emergency? You call up your sponsor, "Larry, I'm so confused right now. I have this sudden urge to just sit on the couch". DO NOT SIT ON THE COUCH! I'm coming over there, we'll surf LinkedIn all night if we have to!   

Who you know can kill you too. This is why I haven’t introduced myself to my upstairs neighbor who is probably a serial killer as evident by her daily furniture rearrangement and nightly marathons of X-Files episodes.

I also want nothing to do with her hipster boyfriend, who takes that subculture to a sci-fi level that you can only see to believe. He pulled up on his bike the other day with - get this - A SECOND BIKE strapped to his back.

Is knowing weirdos the price of making it? Is it worth it? All I know is that all the people I would want to know aren’t good for the all important “network” file. I walked by a homeless gentleman last week. I wore earbuds, but the music was low enough for me to hear him say “Sup gangsta” as I passed by. Best moment of my life to date, hands down. I was this close to stopping, getting him the help he needed to end his homelessness and paying for an education to pursue a career in film and television. Because of all the people I’ve met, he’s the one I wanted to network with the most!