I Have No Idea, but Helena Does!

      At that moment Helena realized she could do anything she wanted. Her only adversary was time. Time and all the rules of physics and whatnot. Even those might have some leeway, if looked into. The question was now, of all the things in the world to do, what would she choose.

     Her first thought was to name herself as ruler of a new township. New Thebes had a certain ring to it. Secondly, a darker thought emerged. She could do a take on the early stages of the film Fight Club, and go to therapist after therapist lying about her life. What jolly fun could be had making up devastating after devastating backstory?! Helena would never know. She ruled against it.

     Next up Helena pondered on priests. They're interesting folk, right? Choosing God over women, that's gotta put a man in a strange place. Maybe she'd comb the world over for an honest priest that could really tell her why he does what he does. What with all the hoopla these days over resigning popes and molestation scandals, that sordid ground seemed a bit fragile, so again Helena turned her thoughts elsewhere.

     Then I thought,' Helena thought, 'I could spark a war between alcoholics and chain smokers, but what fun is in that? Everybody dies one way or another. Why be judgmental for someone who picks their poison?'  Helena really did have these thoughts. Promise.

     Finally, Helena landed on snaping duck necks. She knew it wasn't the best idea she'd ever had, but she was getting tired of thinking. 'I was getting tired of thinking,' Helena recalled.

     This is where I intervened. I happened to be walking my dog that day, and I see this obese woman nearly drowning herself trying to get at some little ducklings. They were quite little fellas. Now, of course, Helena had no real chance of getting ahold of those mallards, because she was a slow, lumbering landlubber of a woman. These ducklings had already learned the ways of the world in their short lives, and staying alive was something each of those little critters was keen to do. And do well.

     I asked Helena if she needed any help. Helena thought no, then said, “No.” Then I invited her over for some tea (I’m a writer, you see, so we like to drink tea or brandy – I’m the tea type, so that tells you the type of writer I am… aka, not the any good at it type). I’m starting to think that Helena might be a good subject to write about, so I ask her why she was out trying to string little avian necks. She says, “Of all the thoughts I had today…” She pauses to take a swig of tea, “That one seemed like the best.” I asked her why she thought she had to think to do something today at all.
     She answered, “Well, I suddenly realized I could do anything I wanted.”